Wednesday, March 03, 2010

Social Tip #203 - Some Are Greater Than Their Whole

Every person is unique, and that's what makes you special. Unless you are twins.

Then you are special, but only for being a creepy, creepy twin.

Identical twins are freaks who make everybody uncomfortable, here is the math to prove it:

Where U is Uniqueness, each person's Uniqueness is valued at one,

U = 1

But Twins, T, are not people, they are creepy people that exist as one person, sharing one Uniqueness,

T = U

Each set of Twins is by definition made up of two partial people, let's call them "twindividuals" (twins a and b), where each twindividual apart from each other is t,

T = t(a) + t(b)
T = 2t

Thus, each t is worth half a Person, and is valued at half Uniqueness,

t(a) = T/2 = U/2 = 1/2

Twinness has its own individual Uniqueness, and bears the Uniqueness value of one. T(a), Twin A in the company of Twin B, bears the uniqueness of itself, and shares half the uniqueness of T with Twin B, T(b).

T(a) = t(a) + T(b)/2

T(b) = t(b) + T(a)/2

As such, their combined value is two unique people,

T(a) + T(b) = 2U

Therefore, they are worth four times as much together as they are apart. That's defies the laws of nature! It does explain their insistence on making everyone uncomfortable by hanging out together, I would defy the laws of nature if I could, too.

Twins = Freaks!


Skyler said...

couldn't agree more, twins also always hang out together because as you said they are freaks and make people uncomfortable, therefore they have no options but each other.

nic0880 said...

You just blew my mind. Best use of equations in a blog...

BrianAlt said...

One problem here.

When you defined t(a) and t(b) you then defined them as different things and therefore unique.

Jack in Calif. said...

To expand upon your extrapolations of algebraic math a bit further you come up with the formula that reads: sh(a)ts = t(b)U

Myka Fox said...

Skyler - isn't it weird that they make people more uncomfortable when they are together, and yet it is their best option? When they are apart, it is that much harder to know which is which.

nic0880 - you just blew my math ego. i hope the real math bloggers don't come by and write an equation proving you wrong.

Brian - I meant (a) and (b) to be subsets of a larger entity. Like the left and right hemisphere of a brain. Two lobes, one brain. Two twindividuals, one "Twins."

Jack - What are "sh" and s" in this equation?

Unless you are making fun of me, in which case:

[sh(a)ts = t(b)U] X 2

Muffled Intellect said...

lmaoo this has got to be one of the funniest blog posts i ever seen.. i sent this to them currently waiting for the backlash,lmaoo

great post

Nitzan said...

my head just exploded.

Bailey Snow said...

What about the people that consume their twin in the womb? Are they super Ux2? Or if my twin died, would I always be lame?